It's too early for pink Crocks...

I'm already in a bit of a nasty mood. I was up until some ungodly hour cleaning my apartment so that by any small chance we may get our deposit back. I stood on my balcony and enjoyed the view one last time, used the toilet one last time, and peeked into my neighbors windows one last time.

Needless to say, these twelve hour days are catching up with me, I am starting to think in serial numbers and marketing part numbers. "Thank you miss, your coffee costs 384698987, will you be using a marketing part number to pay with that?"

Ok, maybe you didn't think that was funny, but that really is how my brain is working right now. So you can only imagine why it was almost impossible for me to drag myself out of bed and get clothes on this morning. And then do you know what I saw when I got to work? You might never believe it...

We have this big burly guy who works here. He must be seven feet tall, and could probably be Hulk Hogans body guard. he is what some people might reffer to as "one big ass motherfucker!" And he was wearing a pair of bright pink Crocks. Imagine the brightest pink you can, and multiply that by ten. It was way worse than the mullet I was forced to sit behind in our meeting for two hours yesterday.

I was not prepared for the visual pollution of either.

But I did have this really awesome conversation with an engineer about vibrators, and it really helped me put the pink Crocks behind me. I thought I would share. Enjoy.

cool: Yeah, I don't motivate myself to remember simple stuff, I can count form 0 to 10000 in binary and tell you all about how your computer or any of your personal and pleasure devices work inside and out

Me: ah, my pleasure devices? It sounds so dirty.

cool: Well, I didn't meant your vibrator, but I did build one of those in college as an experiment.

I meant your camera, your ipod, anything that is used for pleasure, but you went straight to the dirty part.

Me: what kind of experiment was that?

Cool: I had a million dollar idea to build what I called the "ultimate vibrator". It works by just sending magnetic pulses from a distance. Apparently, this technology does not exist yet, so I was hoping to build something that sends waves and resonate and acts just like a vibrator.

Me: did it work?

Cool: that was too complicated to do, so I just decided to build a very power efficient one that doesn't use any batteries at all and that worked amazingly.

Me: I so want one of those.

Cool: Oh yeah, it was a fun project; I almost started my own company building them.

Me: Why didn't you? And what ever happened to this amazing vibrator?

Cool: Well, my professor took it to his house and I think his wife kept it or something. Haha, so every time I asked him for it back he said that he couldn't find, and he's been looking for it. But, I don't believe that.

Me: Damn!