3/30/2011

I had anther bizarre dream last night...

It's been a while since I've dreamed about zombies. These is something so psychological, yet so frightening about these very specific dreams that makes me enjoy them so much. Though my life is in constant danger and I spend the whole dream running and afraid, it also makes me feel very alive. Though in this particular zombie dream there were also tigers, but I'll get to them in a minute. The dream started in the streets with zombie people grabbing and clawing at me, they were much closer to me than they usually get in these dreams. I was with a group of strangers and one man in the group told us he knew a safe place. He lead us to an apartment building where he lived. There were cops and military men outside fighting off zombies. We went inside and took stairs to his floor. When we opened the door to his floor things got a bit weird. Instead of each apartment being segregated by a long hall and locking doors the whole floor was completely opened up. Each apartment was sectioned off by counters and stair rails, but you could stand in the kitchen or living room of any given apartment and yell across the floor to your neighbors. We struggled trying to figured out witch apartment we were looking for considering none of them were marked. We were worried we might enter the wrong apartment and intrude on a hiding tenant who might mistake us for zombies. Eventually the man who led us to his apartment shows up and directs us to his apartment where he begins to disperse household items for use in self defense against the zombies. Things like knives and scissors and other solid hard objects were handed out. I ended up with a knife which I was concerned wasn't sharp enough. All of the items were close range impact weapons and I couldn't help but think I wish I had a gun or something that I could use to defend myself from them zombies at a distance so I didn't have to get so close.
It was about this point in my dream that zombies began to work their way into the building. I was trying to stab them in the heart or neck with my knife but I felt like I just couldn't get enough force to make my attacks effective. So I kept looking for other sharper knives. Then suddenly my sister was there. She had been bit by a zombie and was turning into one. She started to come after me so I attacked her with my knife in the chest. She went down and then it seemed like suddenly we had our hold back on the building. I realized without further defense the zombies would end up taking over eventually so I went and got us two tigers. The dream did not describe how or where I got the tigers, I just suddenly had them. Around the outside area of the building was a fence so we kept the tigers outside near two swimming pools. the idea was that if zombies got over the fence the tigers would eat them. It worked. The zombies were no longer a threat to me, but now the tigers were. I suddenly had a whole new set of problems. I was afraid of the tigers turning and attacking on me, they were pooping all over the place including in one of the pools. And then we were not sure how we would feed them. I ended up giving them pretzels, bread, and frozen hamburger meat as a meal shortly before I woke up from this dream.
When I did finally wake up I had a pounding headache, as I often do when I was such intense dreams for such a prolonged period of time.

2/24/2011

Bostons don't like camping...

Niamh ( pronounced Neav) is snubbing me while Annibell tries to get the dirt out of her eyes. What a couple of pussies.

4/28/2010

4/20/2010

Dear drunk insurance lady...

I'm sure you have all seen one of those moments where two girls are fighting because one girl hit on the other girls boyfriend. Kind of like this... (P.S. This video is so not appropriate for work)



Yep, that was almost me, almost. If only I had an ounce of fight in me. Sadly, I'm full of hugs and marshmallows and rum, none of which are good for putting sleazy insurance ladies in their place. Also, I probably would have lost and, dammit, I'm too pretty for jail!

Anyways, my point is this, I've never understood the whole "two girls fighting over a boy" thing before. I've seen it happen, I've been mistaken for a sleazy insurance lady before, and I always thought it was a jealousy thing. I don't believe in jealousy. I think it's more a symptom of an underlying emotion rather than it's own emotion. For example, if a girl sees another girl hit on her boyfriend she might feel jealous because she is insecure in her relationship and with herself and worries her boyfriend might just go for the bait.

Except there I was at some smokey giddy up bar in Coalville with my super handsome boyfriend when he ran into the girl who handles his family's insurance account. And do you know what she did? After my boyfriend introduced us? While I was standing right there? She hit on him! as in flirting and body language and standing too close and, seriously, wtf? Who does that? Anyways, I won't lie, it pissed me off. And not because I was jealous but because it was completely disrespectful.

So now I get the whole, "Bitch, stay away from my man" thing. I suddenly feel humbled. I'm bringing the dog's spray bottle with us to the bar next time just in case we run into that girl again. Someone needs to teach her a lesson.

3/30/2010

Dear Virgin Mobile...

Please go fuck yourself. Without lube. Just you and your dry flaky hand.

In fact, I bet that is what you're doing right now, instead of fixing my broken service. What else could you have been doing for the last THREE months? Seriously, and every time I call about it things only get worse. Which leads me to believe you must just be fucking with me.

It's not nice, so knock it off please.

All I want is to be able to drunk text people and receive their responses, is that too much to ask? seriously, text messaging is a very ineffective tool if it only works one way. I feel like a deaf person having a verbal conversation with someone else. They may be picking up what I'm laying down but I'll be damned if I have any clue what's going on.

This sucks.