I'm going to try to make this short and simple. My mother wants to sue my father for the years of child support he owes. She calculated it to be somewhere around eighty thousand dollars, and she wants consent form my sisters and I to do so. On the one hand, my mother deserves this money but on the other if we go through with it I loose any possible chance to ever have a relationship with my father. Both of these arguments deserve a bit more attention.
Some people think my mother is just being selfish for deciding to sue after all these years, but they don't understand what she had to sacrifice to make sure we were fed, clothed, and housed. She was never able to take a vacation, have nice things, or start a retirement fund, which I believe is what she will do with the majority of the money should she sue. And it's my personal opinion that she has every right to sue and has every right to keep the money, after all, it wasn't my sisters and I who sacrificed.
The only reason I am afraid to give her the OK is because as of late I have been considering making contact with my father, maybe send him some sort of hear felt email about how screwed up I am because he is not around. If there is anything I want most out of my life right now it would be a very close call between having a relationship with my father, and having the man of my dreams to wake up to. Since I won't be waking up next to the love of my life any time soon I will just have to settle on good old Dad, but how can I guarantee that if I try to start a relationship with him that he will reciprocate? And if he does how can I be sure it will be a relationship worth having? And who am I tell tell my mother she can't sue him and get what she deserves because I want to give the bastard a second chance? Maybe I'll wear my heart on my sleeve and at the very least tell him how I have felt since he walked away and never looked back. That way even if I don't get a chance to start a relationship I at least spoke up about how fucked up he has been. I think that would make me feel somewhat better.