Life has been busy, crazy, and a bit intoxicating lately. It has been almost impossible to reserve a few minutes out of my day to post a new blog or even organize my thoughts and find some inspiration so I give up. If your not the kind of person who can't process unrelated, unorganized, and useless information I suggest you stop reading now. If my brain clutter is ok with you then continue below to a list of random thoughts stuck inside my brain. Sadly, the majority of my thoughts must be censored as they pertain to many sensitive situations that are not yet behind me, but don’t worry, once it’s all dust in my trail I will be sure to leave an ungodly long post.

1) Bill Clinton is coming to Colorado in June to give a speech at the unveiling of the Columbine memorial. I hope to go and get a couple photos of the former President (aka king of blowjobs). A.J. wants to come so he can ask how Monica is doing. Remind me to have him detained.

2) Why on earth did I think it was necessary to show my mole to a stripper? Like she cared.

3) How long will I sit here and rot? I guess what I am trying to say is.... I have no ideal, forget it.

4) With all the money I paid out to my divorce lawyer I could have hired a hit man to take Ken out AND get a boob job. If only I had known that before.

5) We got a new washer and dryer, now I am afraid I will never have any clean laundry. I can't figure out how to work the damn things. What was wrong with our old washer and dryer? They worked just fine so why replace them? I know my mom secretly did that just to mess with me; she can be evil like that.

6) I get to photograph a naked food fight this weekend; I wonder if there will be dessert.

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