While enduring my twelve hour work/Frank Sinatra marathon, I thought I would kill two birds with one stone. I've got to write a short bio about myself for a new project I've been invited to contribute to. It's a book of short stories written by a group of female bloggers (me included). However, I can't seem to concentrate; all I can think of is how I would totally throw my wet knickers at Frank Sinatra if I were around in his day.

Anyways, the madame of the project has requested that each of us write a little something about ourselves including "education, hobbies, family, interests, etc..."

I have no idea what to write. If I wanted to be honest I'd write something along the lines of :

"Majored in business, english, history, and photography but ultimately received a Guinness Book of World records mention for being the only person to drop out of college four times. It is the only thing she has ever accomplished."

"Has a killer knack for photography, blogging about shit, and making fun of stupid people while not always avoiding to be one."

"Born from a family full of dysfunctional in-breeders. Her family is best known for their photograph in Webster's dictionary next to the word "hillbilly". And yes, her motto is, "duct tape can fix that."

"She is very interested in the mating habits of human beings and therefore can often be found with porn in hand or, more likely, on screen."

So, I think we all know it's best if I just avoid the truth and sugarcoat a few things, which is a talent I do not possess. Any suggestions?

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